अधुरो दशैँ

-इन्दुकेश

कल-कल बग्ने त्यो जोगमाई खोला
झर-झर झर्ने त्यो डुम्रे झरना
त्यो बाल्यकाल सम्झेर ल्याउदा
समिप आफ्नो कोही नपाउँदा
दर्हो यो मन भात्कन लाग्यो
आँशुका दाना तप्कन थाल्यो

दशैँ नि आयो तिहार नि आयो
अभागी निधार खाली नै रह्यो
सयपत्री फूल गाँसेर चेली
पर्खदै होली म आउला भनी
देउसी र भैलो खेलिन्थ्यो होला
मादलको तालमा नचिन्थ्यो होला

त्यो बेनी हाट, त्यो पूर्णे मेला
दौतरी सबै भेट भए होला
आफु छु यहाँ मन हुन्छ वहाँ
भाग्यले मलाई डोर्‍यायो कहाँ
गाउँको यादले ठप्प भो बोली
भर्नु छ मैले साहुको झोली

पर्खेर माया बसेकी होली
दिन रात गन्दै थाकेकी होली
मेला र पात धाउँदी होली
मनमा कुरा गुनाउदी होली
कहिले आउला त्यो हाम्रो दिन
खुशीमा दिन बिताउने क्षण !!

बाँकी अंश...

And those memories............

-Sishir Gautam

I was one of those guys who lived the life as it came, didn’t think of long future ahead. But things were to change as she would come into my life. I had to change; my whole world was to be given a different complexion. It was inevitable that I had to change for she was around me now. She had that magic on me. She would go on and on; I would just listen to her. I loved every time she would try to change things around me. She was so graceful and so beautiful that I felt I was on top of the world just to be around her.

I kept wondering how on earth such a dumb and slack guy like myself get to know the most beautiful girl in this world. Oh god, she truly was out of this world. Everything was so perfect about her. She was down to earth but had that flair and flamboyancy to do things gracefully and with perfection. How on earth I got to know her? I always wondered it must be a fairytale or must be part a movie where the hero always gets the beautiful heroine. But this was the real life and no fairytale or a movie. I just happen to be honest that brought her into my life.

One evening I was returning to my place. It was almost dark and I saw something shiny on the road. When I picked it, it was a ladies purse and had few thousand rupee notes. I was pretty pleased to find some extra money. I was very much tempted to take the money and throw the purse somewhere in the bin. But I thought otherwise, so took it home. When I reached home, went through the purse once again, I found there were few other things in the purse. Oh! There was a passport with an American Visa dated the same day. I couldn’t believe my eyes, how can someone lost their purse with such an important thing. I then looked at the other papers, found a CV of the girl.I called the girl at the contact address the very first morning the next day. She was so thrilled to hear from me; wanted to meet me the very instant. We met in the afternoon so I could give her what was hers. There she explained me how much she was excited to get the visa that on a rush home she didn’t realized that her purse had dropped from her scooter. Fortunately for her, I found it.

That’s how I met her. She was as beautiful as ever when I first saw her. She was wearing a black kurta, I still remember, she was truly gorgeous. She was thanking me again and again for returning the things of her best friend. She later told me, she liked me when she first saw me for I looked decent that day. But I had fallen in love with her the same day. She was so simple yet so beautiful and charming. I wouldn’t take my eyes off her and listen to her smoothing voice.

Wonderful time were to follow that day, we would meet every now and then, have a great time together. We were slowly and truly falling in love. Every night I went to sleep with a feeling that a wonderful time awaits me tomorrow where I would be with her. We used to have a short time together but I enjoyed every moment of it. I was on top of the world; I was having the greatest time of my life. I used to wait for Saturdays more eagerly than ever, that would be the day we would spent a whole day together. We would go far from our place and spent the whole day together. She would do all the talking and I always let her. I simply loved to listen to whatever she had to say. Ah! Those were quality times I can never forget.

Sundays to Fridays, I used to wait for her to finish her work. She was a hard working girl but I was a good for nothing guy. I had no job, just used to wander with my friends. I actually at that time didn’t felt like I had to find a job and think about my future. But after I met her, fell in love with her she changed me. She loved me the way I was but her presence, words and her vision of life slowly started to make me a responsible person. I then started to look towards the future and think about how I should go, to fulfil her dreams and ours.

That’s when I made the biggest decision of my life. I decided to leave her, my beautiful angel, to go abroad for work and earn some money for our future. She was my guide; she had showed me the way to do something in life and for the future. When I told her that I was going abroad for work and leave her there, she was shattered. She didn’t show the emotions then but I now know she never wanted me to leave her ever. She wanted me to do something in life but definitely not on that expense. She from the inner heart didn’t want to let me go but she encouraged me to go and do something good. I was such a fool; how could I ever leave love of my life just like that. The day I was leaving, I saw tears in her eyes. I had seen her cry for the first time. Her tears were saying me not to go away but I had become too ambitious, I didn’t hear her inner voice. I was about to leave the most precious gift I had got just like that. I realized what I was about to do but thought I wasn’t leaving her for good. I would come back for her soon very soon.

I had so many dream that I was supposed to fulfil. Work as much hard as possible, earn some big money and go back to my girl who was waiting for me. But when I get there I realized how foolish I had been to leave my country and my beautiful girl behind. I was finding hard to survive, saving some money to take back home was a distance away. Every night I would just remember her, all the words she used to say to me with her big eyes wide open. All those moments we shared together would remind me of what I was missing. I would reluctantly go to sleep with tears in my eyes. Even the dream would elude me from meeting her.

Every morning I would wake up with some renewed hope of finding something good today but my evening would end in a disappointment. I would give her a call every now and then, hearing her voice would give me the pleasure of my life. All her words would encourage me to keep fighting and achieve what I came for. But time was not in my side and the cruel world was determined not to do me any favours.

Four years passed with me at the same position where I started. I could see no silver lining in the sky. I didn’t want to return home empty handed before but now I had lost all my hopes. I kept thinking there is someone eagerly waiting for me. So I decided to go back to her, do whatever comes and just be with her. The end of year was near so I decided to leave by the end of the year. Thinking about going back home and be with her would bring a smile in my face. I was so happy to go back. I hadn’t spoken with her for almost six months; I would surprise her big time by going straight in front of her.


I called my parents just a few days before I was to leave for home. I told them I would get married to her as soon I get there. But there voice didn’t sound cheerful; I could hear my mother crying. I couldn’t believe what I heard then; she had got married just a few weeks ago. Her parents had forced her to get married. Everybody had lost hope on me. I couldn’t believe even she had lost hope on me. I was furious then but later realized she couldn’t wait no longer. She had waited for me all those years hoping I would return back to her. She had her dreams and whole life ahead so she had to move on. I was a bit late, I always have been.

Here I am now, well established, doing really good. It’s been twenty years since I left home. It’s been a long time since I saw her pretty face, her beautiful big eyes, small but cute nose, her long and silky hair and her dazzling smile. She still must be as beautiful and fragrant as she always used to be. I can still remember her face with tears in her eyes and those words “come back to me soon, my love”. I couldn’t go back to her and wipe those tears that had fallen for me. I couldn’t fulfill her dreams and give her what she deserved. She is gone for good now and must be doing well wherever she might be. But her memories...................... wouldn’t simply go away.

बाँकी अंश...